The enemy whispers that I am not worthy of this life I have. That people don’t really love me for who I am, they only want something from me. The Lord says, I am VICTORIOUS!
I made poor choices as a young adult and chose to become a stripper. I longed for the attention and affection of men. I never felt loved as a child and men always paid attention to me. The enemy convinced me that I would never be anything but a whore and no one really wanted me, just my body and only for sex. When I see half-naked women on social media it makes me sad, it makes me wonder why they are doing it, and if they felt the same way I do.
I chose the word VICTORIOUS. Knowing how God sees me through his eyes has allowed me to be imperfect and accept it. I know that I am perfect in His eyes and that is truly all that matters. I wouldn’t be the wife or mother I am today if God didn’t bring me out f the darkness I was in. He never gave up on me, no matter how many times I returned to my old ways. He is the light! I surrendered completely and let him transform my heart to accept love and truly believe that it was true, I was worth love and I didn’t have to give anything in return.
The enemy constantly tries to remind me of where I came from. To look at myself in the mirror and remind me that I need to be perfect. I can’t age, I can’t gain weight. I can’t have a body that’s not worthy of being a stripper. He tells me to get to the gym, go to the tanning bed. Then the Holy Spirit rises up in me and reminds me it’s ok to be ME. Fat, white, old. I am ME and that’s good enough and my Lord and Savior thinks I am worth dying for.
“For the Lord God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you VICTORY.” Deuteronomy 20:4